People need to belong in a number of different ways.
by Joe Myers
Intimacy may be a worthy goal, but small groups are mostly about learning how to talk to one another. At least that's what Joe Myers, "multi-preneur" and author of The Search to Belong: Rethinking Intimacy, Community, and Small Groups (Zondervan), believes.
Myers shared his thoughts on small groups and community recently with Brett Eastman, CEO and Founder of Lifetogether:
Wisdom from the Book of Proverbs that can help you listen well
by Kathleen Miller
Jane called just as I was walking out the front door. Juggling my bag, Bible, and car keys, I answered the phone. "Hi," she said. "Have you got a minute?" I said I did, because I had told the members of my Bible study to call me anytime.
Jane was upset because her best friend, Sarah, had decided to leave the church. I knew Sarah's move stemmed from a ministry opportunity elsewhere. So instead of empathizing ...
A collection of resources that can improve your listening skills and help you apply them in small-group situations
"Small Groups in Depth" collections are assembled by the editors of SmallGroups.com as a method of continuing education for people participating in small-groups ministry. Each collection offers step-by-step training on a specific ministry skill or practice. Individuals may read through each resource on their own as a method of self improvement, or may customize the articles, discussion questions, ...
Follow these steps for greater understanding, attention, and empathy.
Michael Mack
Listening is a crucial skill for small-group leaders to master. Here are ten practical tips for improving our listening habits.
Be quiet. This should be obvious, but it often is the biggest obstruction to listening. The leader should be part of a discussion without monopolizing it.
Try to understand. The goal of listening is to understand what the person is really saying.
Eliminate distractions. People feel comfortable sharing when they are not interrupted. Turn the phone ringer off. Make sure you have childcare arranged. Don't look at your watch or lesson plan when someone is speaking.
Great small group leaders know the key ingredient is relationship! What separates good leaders from the great ones isn't style or techniques, but rather that they need to get involved in the lives of their small group members.
Karen Hurston, who grew up in David Yonggi Cho's church in Korea, and later served on staff there, now works as a consultant to cell churches (churches built around small groups, ...
Small group members listed what's most important to them.
Michael C. Mack
Research shows that group members require four basic attributes in their leaders (reported in the June 1992 Pryor Report). How do these apply to you and your group?
The leader should be viewed as "one of us," not as an outsider.
The leader should be viewed as the "most of us," with the same norms and values of others in the group.
The leader should be viewed as the "best of us," able to harness the group's expertise and energy to carry out the tasks of the group.
"Community as God envisioned it can never be reduced to dynamics and skills," says Julie Gorman (Christian Education Journal, Spring 1993, pp. 14, 15).
She suggests that we should not confuse the development of skills with the building of community. "We must not let techniques and skills become uppermost in small groups," she says. "Community is developed not only by insight into relational skills ...
How to make the study of body language work for you.
Michael C. Mack
"Susan, you look like you're thinking about something. Have you got something to add?"
"I do? Well, now that you mention it, I did want to say something."
How did this group leader know that Susan wanted to speak? He noticed that she was sitting on the edge of her chair, rubbing her chin, tapping her foot. In other words, he noticed her body language.
We are called to encourage each other towards righteousness, but confrontation is never an easy situation.
Steven Reames
Nobody likes to confront bad behavior. Most employers wait until the last possible minute before calling their subordinates on the carpet. Temper tantrums in grocery stores can be embarrassing for parents, but spanking your child in public brings "child abuse charge" fears to mind. Even worse, when confrontation is handled poorly in a church setting, legal retribution is only one thing leaders have ...
One of the more uncomfortable aspects of discipling another believer is admonishment. A proper understanding of biblical admonishment, however, can raise our comfort level and benefit both discipler and disciple.
Admonishment isn't a license to boss someone around or confront angrily. Godly admonishment is gentle and motivated by a desire to prevent sin. It keeps the other person's interests uppermost. ...
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